Riffs by Eddie Van Halen

Jams by Trey Anastasio

Funks by Anthony Kiedis and Flea

Whines by Chris Martin

Grunts by Russell Crowe

Noodles by Dave Matthews

Farts by Ariel Pink

Jangles by Tom Petty

British Affectations by Madonna

Nonsensical Egotistical Rantings by Kanye West

Overbearing Social Activisms by Bono

Sexual Napalms by Jessica Simpson and John Mayer

Discomfiting Twerkings by Miley Cyrus

Laughably Nepotistic Efforts by Will, Jada Pinkett, Willow, and Jaden Smith

What’s the Frequency, Kenneths? by Michael Stipe

Proclamations by the Proclaimers

Cheats by Milli Vanilli

Hubrises by Justin Bieber

The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes!