I can’t wait to see you and
envelope you in my arms
I mean envelop
Not envelope fucking shit fuck

Time passes faster these days
Childhood seeming further and further away
I can’t even recall what I looked like
when I was a boy
I wonder if I have any old yearbooks
lying around
Here’s one
Is that me?
What an awful hat
I wore that hat all the time

A winter wind blows cold
it’s cold here in winter
our love was warm once, like summer
but now it’s cold like winter
I’d say the temperature hovers around thirty
maybe forty
no thirty degrees
I can see my breath ah jesus fucking christ we get it man fuck

When I see you I’m dizzy
My head is swimming
And I can see nothing else
I might need to lie down for a minute
Do you have any Tums

I feel the way you
Make me younger
For that I thank you
All the time
This was accidentally an acrostic

The taste of berries
swirling with cinnamon
Sun dapples the patio
grass tickles the underside of my feet
Are there nuts in this?
The cobbler
Did you put nuts in the cobbler?
Why didn’t you tell me?
oh fuck
Jesus fuck
fuck you


The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes!


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