If you’ve found this bottle, I want to preface this by saying that there are some details here that might make you think this message is a prank, but it is not. This is a real actual “message in a bottle.”

HELP! SOS! My boat got a leak and I’m now stuck on a deserted island. The island is at longitude 420 and latitude 69. Yes, this is really where I am. I get that both 420 and 69 are numbers that sound fake/funny, but, please look past that and help.

My best friend Wilson is barely alive. And, of course, I know Wilson was the volleyball from the movie Castaway. But, this is a real guy named Wilson who is dying, so please take this message seriously.

Lastly, please bring supplies. Unfortunately, the only things I have with me are my five favorite cd’s. It’s just a mere coincidence that I have my “desert island discs” with me. I have no way to play them, so I can’t even listen to Dylan, The Stones, Marvin Gaye, Mozart and Hoobastank. I like Hoobastank…that is not a joke! Unfortunately, people have formed strong negative opinions about Hoobastank based on a small sample size. They are much better/subtle than most realize.



The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes! 



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