paigeasteriostext_breakupTexting is hard. We’re here to help. Have you ever received a text that made you think, “Whoa, am I no longer in a relationship??” Next time this happens, don’t fret, just see if that texts matches any of the below. If it does, you’re out on your ass, buddy. All of these texts are guaranteed to mean you are officially single starting right now.

Who’s this? New relationship

L8r dude (4ever)

Have u ever been broken up w by text now u have emoji_openmouthface

U wanna PML (peppermint mocha latte) and also to not date??

I love you (but only as a friend suddenly)

You can’t spelled “dumped over text” without “u”

Are you ok? Heard about the break up

Happy #NationalBreakupDay! emoji_celebration

What are you doing tonight? Personally I am breaking up with you around 8pm then free

U up? For not dating?

Hey I’m outside can you let me in I need to tell you I don’t love you anymore

Bad news our relationship died emoji_angelemoji_angelemoji_angel

I’m emoji_poop ing you. Get it?

I miss you

#FeelTheBern of this break up. Sanders 2016 ;)

Oh you got an iPhone! I can tell bc blue bubbles. Ok, well, I’m dumping you

Hey sorry just saw this text! Prob bc I don’t pay enough attention to you do you maybe just want to break up?


The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes!