Pangaea put the “super” in “supercontinent.” 

Greek for “all-earth,” Pangaea was so much more straightforward than the aloof continent names of today.

Born from a collaboration of “great continents” (Paleozoic and Gondwana/Euramerica), Pangaea was destined to be a boss.

You’d have to go to outer space to find a bigger hunk of rock.

Think the world is connected now because of the internet? When Pangaea was around, Africa and the Americas were spooning partners.

The sun never set on Pangaea.

It had a ruling class of big-ass reptiles and amphibians.

You could see the whole world, no air travel required!

The Atlantic, Pacific, and all those other oceans were united as the Panthalassic Ocean. (Cool name, right?)

True bugs came about. If it weren’t for Pangaea, we’d still be living with bug impersonators whose mouthparts aren’t even designed for successful plant piercing and sucking–LAME.

It existed lucky number 300 million years ago.

No student loan debt!

Pangaea was around for the Permian and Triassic days. How many geological time periods have YOU made it through? 

If earth’s landmasses can’t stay together, what hope is there for your relationships?



The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes!