Ways My Mother Has Ended Recent Emails
July 17, 2013

I am worried about you a bit, not sure why.

I could be completely wrong and you are being tracked by our government who is checking into whatever crazy things you people are doing in L.A.

After reading some of your tweets, I am a little worried about you. Is everything ok? Call anytime.

Hope you are getting all the love you deserve.

I think Liberace had a lot of self hate. Yet, people who knew him described him as kind, nice, generous. I guess they weren’t in relationships with him.

I would love to do birdfeeders here, but won’t.

Should I be on your facebook? What am I missing that you should be filling me in on??

The only girls who ever get on tv are mentally ill.

I have my original hotmail email address from when they first started, and now I can’t even navigate this new horrible thing.

Gave the cat a flea dose. Did not like it.



The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes!


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